Both women and men for years and years have asked the same question that our grandparents asked: “How will I know?” Well, in todays society, love is a two way street. It takes two to make a relationship and two to break it. Most often, it is not one sided. Love conquers all. Some will tell you that they stay clear from it and as Bonnie Tyler sang it best…. “It’s a Heartache” nothing but a heartache. So, the question at hand is this; How will I know if he really loves me? Well, don’t ask Whitney Houston, we all know how her relationship with Mr Bobby Brown turned out…my advice…follow your heart and listen to your gut. If something doesn’t feel right, it probably isn’t. I’ve taken the liberty to dig up some questions and answers to the top worries we have in relationships….I thought you might want to take a lookie.
1. If you observe his actions rather than his words, what have you learned? You know they always say that actions speak louder than words. Is he nice, and kind and caring…or does he mistreat animals, talk down to the wait staff at restaurants when you go on dates, or act prejudice? Pay close attention…both men and women are silent threats….but actions sound our horn loud and clear. I have built in radar. My kids always laughed at me when I said that while they were growing up, but I always knew when something didn’t feel right. Use your better judgement. If it feels wrong, it probably is. Like a leopard, sooner than later his true colors will show, and these are some serious spots you’ll want to stay clear from if this is the case.
2. Does he constantly treat you with respect or does he do so sparingly and inconsistently? People who are truly in love know this… treating the one you love with respect is a full time duty!
You cannot pick and choose the time and place to be kind, considerate, and respectful. He is either respectful full-time or he is not. It really is that simple. He is not entitled to pick and choose!
3. In your relationship, are you treated as an equal partner? Listen sister…you damn straight should be! When someone really loves you, they treat you as an equal partner – as a person who has an equal voice in your relationship. Your voice does matter…and if your partner thinks that it doesn’t….cut your losses and walk away now. If he makes the significant decisions in your relationship and relegates you to following his directives, then he really does NOT love you. In the best loving relationships between a man and a woman, both share equally in the relationship.
4. When you are in love, you can’t imagine life without him! So try this question on him – “Honey, do you love me more than life itself? Can you imagine life without me?” If his answer makes you wonder about the depth of his commitment to you, he doesn’t truly love you. He is not the man you should commit your life to!
5. People who truly love each other say it and live it daily! Does he tell you he loves you? Does he do it without prodding? Does his love for you come naturally, repeatedly, and frequently? The truth of the matter is this – when you love someone, you tell them. And don’t fall for that old line that goes like this – “I don’t need to tell her I love her because she knows.” This notion is just plain wrong! If he doesn’t tell you, then your relationship is in trouble and in my own words… “Houston, We have a Problem!” My advice is don’t wait until it becomes an issue….watch for signs and talk about it.
6. I trust him more that life itself. Your trust in him is unequivocal and without hesitation.
Here is the question of the day – Is the man you purport to love a man you trust without question? If the answer is no, then you need to reconsider the question, does he really love me? It’s not hard to do…and this is not a multiple choice question. He either loves you or he doesn’t! End of discussion.
7. In the end, if he really loves you, he is always there for you – through the good times and the bad. When somebody loves you, they love you through thick and thin. They love you without conditions. They love you when you are at your best and when you are at your worst.
When you are really in love, he makes you feel good and you do the same for him. You are stronger because he is a part of your life. He makes you excited about where your relationship is going. It’s a positive reality!
Remember…The measure of his love for you is always, in the end, about consistency. When you love someone, you cannot pick and choose the times you show you care, when you express love, and when you demonstrate your affection for the one you love. If his love for you is conditional, sporadic, and only comes when the times are good, you have to answer yourself this simple question – does he really and truly love me? You decide….and that my friend….is HOW YOU KNOW!