Finding Your Happy Ever After…

For the longest time most everyone I know has had their own idea about what the right person would be like, and by ‘right person’ I am talking their mate. We search and we search and often we come up empty handed..why? Most of us have the tendencies to see the birds-eye-view. Hey folks, it’s time for a change of scenery!

The men/women that we search out appear to really have their shit together but as we dig deeper we find that they aren’t what we anticipated. Are you looking for that perfect someone to share your life with? Finding that elusive ideal mate doesn’t come that easily for most of us because we haven’t learned the importance of being very clear in our thoughts what type of person would truly make us happy. It is nearly impossible for the universe to deliver a perfect package. 

 So tell me then…Are we too picky? Some would say no. I say yes. Yes because you should want what you want and settle for nothing less. Lowering your standards isn’t the answer to finding love. Who wants to settle for someone less attractive, less caring, less intelligent, etc.? Some people are on an eternal quest to find a “perfect” partner, one who probably doesn’t exist outside of the storybooks. Since childhood, we’ve been taught to keep an eye out for Prince (or Princess) Charming. Grown-up movies and romantic comedies perpetuate these expectations and we’re waiting for the dashing hero/heroine who will intuitively understand our plight and rescue us from our suffering. Unless you fell off the turnip truck and conked your head, this doesn’t happen…(the dashing in to save the damsel in distress part anyway…)

The point I am trying to make here is that often we cannot see the true perspective in full view. You have to have the mindset of finding true love and happiness, not some mythical expectations that you’ll live happily ever after. That way, if your speculations fall short, you won’t feel so let down.

The truth is, until he or she arrives, most of the time we feel rather lost. Sure we all say that we enjoy the life of being single, but are you feeling the love when you go to sleep alone every night wishing that you had someone to share ‘pillow talk’ with? We all want love, want some lasting relationships. The  phenomenon of it all is that many people seem to believe that it is way hard to find. I beg to differ…I believe that your mate is out there and that somewhere he sits waiting patiently too for the right woman to come his way. My grandmother used to tell me that the right kind of love was like a hidden treasure. Buried deep below the surface, nonetheless transparent to that one person who could see through the particles that tend to get in the way of our somewhat clouded vision. Looks are not everything. Character, ethics, loyalty, morals, and values are all part of the equation that you should have in your list of ‘wants and needs’ in your partner. Ones demeanor; presence, expression transform into our desires. Don’t skimp in the ‘must have’ department. When you meet the right person, things will all fall into place. 

This is love found looking in the mirror, an idealized image of yourself. An attitude like this is based upon non-acceptance of whom and what we really are. When we use another person to build up our own self-image, this kind of relationship is grounded in fear. Without this person we might feel as if we were nothing, and our lives were meaningless. Love can never  be built upon a foundation that is not real. If we do not feel secure within ourselves, is it really so surprising we may not really be so eager, after all, for this perfect person to appear at our door?                       

Many people ask me; “What keeps us from finding the love we are so  hungry for?” The most common answer to this question is that we must find the perfect person. There is always something wrong with the people we meet. We look for flaws, and imperfections.

Your particular idea of what attractive is, however, could be unrealistic. While it’s ridiculous to commit to someone you aren’t fundamentally attracted to, it’s amazing how much more attractive someone becomes when you love them. Attractiveness is a quality that can vary slightly an infinite number of times throughout the day. These variations are based partly on physical attributes but also on attitude, chemistry, personality and sense of humor.

Way too often, a first date never happens because the initial attraction isn’t there. But attraction that is fully developed on a first encounter is probably skin-deep; there isn’t much hope of ever becoming any more attracted to that person than you are right now. Mature attraction grows based on traits that may be initially less apparent. Equally important is your mindset — beauty is truly in the eye of the beholder. Choosing to continually look for your partner’s beauty (rather than for his/her defects) helps renew our initial attraction.

Appeal that is defined strictly in colors or measurements limits our creative capacity for seeing beauty in others. It also limits our dating options. You may be attracted to height — and that’s fine. But do you really need your partner to tower over you? You may prefer long and lean (or curvy) physiques, but are you willing to accept the common “defects” that often accompany each body type?

 Certainly ones looks are largely predetermined by DNA. However, we are made more or less beautiful by our actions and attitudes. Likewise, we have the ability to paint our impressions of others in either more generous or less generous strokes. When you find someone with the baseline traits you are looking for,… look past superficial flaws. 

My advice, and this is strictly non-professional of course,…Decide what attributes form the essential outline of your “perfect” mate; don’t worry if a few cosmetic features stray outside those boundaries. Love is art, not science. Small “imperfections” prove authenticity and can add unique beauty and dimension to a person. No he or she may not be a beauty queen or a handsome king, but oh the qualities that they hold within are worth their weight in gold and happiness is an attribute that is far more rewarding that someone who appears to have it all together on the outside but lacks so many true qualities on the inside. 

http://www.simplydeliciouslingerie.com

 

 

Why Relationships Go Bad?

Why do relationships go south when they seemed to be going so well? Even worse, how are you going talk about this to people? Your perfect relationship, the one that was destined to last forever, just fell to pieces… and now, it’s over. How could you have let something so wonderful just slip through your fingers without even realizing it? You can ask yourself this until you are blue in the face.The truth is relationships fail for all sorts of reasons. However, there are a top four that tend to tell the tale of love gone wrong, and I am going to share them with you now.

Money

It’s been said over and over again – “money is the root of all evil.” I believe that there is some truth to be told in that expression. Whether or not that is entirely true, it is indeed at the root of many relationship problems. Both partners need to be on the same page as far as money is concerned. Issues can arise when one person is a saver and the other is a spender. Any major purchases should be discussed and agreed upon prior to buying. Even daily expenditures can become a problem. Be sure you both understand where the money is coming from in your relationship and where it will go. Don’t let money be the most important thing in your relationship,…if you do, that isn’t love.

Communication

This will be the longest of the four that I have listed only because I believe that in any solid relationship, communication is KEY! Remember the song, ‘you say it best when you say nothing at all’? Well, it does not work all the time. Communication in relationships is important if you want your loved ones to be with you all your life, and for this to happen it is important to express your feelings to them and let them know what they mean to you. Today, in our daily hectic schedule, we forget to pay attention to the needs of our loved ones. We are so engaged in our daily chores, that we start taking our relationships for granted. Effects of lack of communication in a relationship are such that it makes the bond of relationship weaker by creating doubts, and disrespect. It is better to discuss and sort out your problems in any relationship, instead of living in ambiguity and suspicion.

Why Communication is Important in Relationships Lack of communication with your partner can make you feel lonely and isolated. According to psychologists, such people tend to withdraw from social activities and are emotionally vulnerable. The consequences of lack of communication are such that it affects the whole personality of the human being, and it also affects his personal, professional and social life. It is observed by psychologists and human behavior experts, that relationships with good communication not only last longer, but people in such healthy relationships seem to be happier than people stuck in unhealthy relationships. Lack of communication affects your relationship with your family members, friends as well as at your work place. It can even break existing as well as potential relationships. These day people are individualistic and believe in personal space. But too much of space only widens the gap between people.

So express yourself to your loved ones, talk about the problems in your life, share your deepest fears and secrets with each other, and cherish the best moments of life together. It will make you come closer and will make you bond stronger. At the heart of money and all other issues is generally a lack of communication. Some couples don’t talk about things that bother them. Others talk, but their conversations tend to deteriorate into arguments. Another group tends to assume their partners can read their minds and should know what is at the heart of any problem. Obviously, this isn’t the case.Putting the time and the effort into reaching a level of communication that involves equal parts speaking and listening, as well as a healthy dose of understanding and a heavy coating of thick skin can go a long way towards keeping a relationship happy.

Selfishness

Just talking about a problem isn’t enough. Every problem needs a resolution. You have to work through it! Even the best communicators can fail at this point. If either side refuses to budge, all the talking in the world won’t fix things. Stop being so damn stubborn and try to fix this! Relationships require compromise and a lot of it. Even if a couple is perfectly in sync on every issue for a long time, eventually they will run across something they don’t see eye to eye on. This is where compromise becomes necessary. Both people need to be willing to give a little so they can reach a decision they are both able to live with. Remember, this is about two of you, not just one, so think about the other person involved here.

Family

While it is wonderful to paint a picture of your relationship as existing in its own little bubble world, both people involved have families who were with them long before they met each other and will likely stick around for the remainder of their lives. The importance of this group of people cannot be ignored. They can be friends, confidantes, or even the measure against which your relationship is compared. Remember the old saying– “you don’t just marry the person, you marry the family.” Do not dismiss their family as unimportant. Do not try to break the bonds that exist between them. Instead, try to form your own bonds with the other person’s family. If that isn’t possible, at least try to keep your feelings about them from destroying the relationship you hold dear. There are certainly other problems that can affect and destroy relationships, but the above four are often at the heart of the issue. If those are kept in check, everything else can be dealt with as it comes along, and your relationship is likely to last as long as you want it to. Take my advice; Take the time to communicate and make it work!

 

 

Drop 5 Pounds Easy!

How many times have you heard someone say that they want to lose five pounds? And how many times have you heard that the diet starts tomorrow? Isn’t that an old cliche?

cli·ché/klēˈSHā/

Noun:

A phrase or opinion that is overused and betrays a lack of original thought. A very predictable or unoriginal thing or person.

Tell me, and let’s be honest here….

We talk the talk, but when we open that pantry door and see a bag of potato chips, out the window goes those thoughts of wanting to lose weight because we would much rather induldge in fat and grease. The truth at hand is,losing a mere five pounds is very realistic and it can be a great kick-start to your metabolism and energy levels. Plus, it can help you fit into that little black dress or suit for that upcoming wedding, reunion, or vacation. First though YOU have to make the commitment to start now, not tomorrow, not Monday, but right now!

Below is a healthy plan to help you shed 5 pounds quickly, easily and most importantly, the healthy way. As with all diets, check with your doctor before starting any weight loss or exercise plan. If I can do it, anyone can do it!

1. Begin by drinking more water.Lay off the soda/pop whatever you call it. I get caffeine headaches because I have been drinking it for wayyyyyy too long. Coca Cola has become my best friend over the years and is my wake up, and get up and go in the morning and through out the day. Nonetheless, I did realize that I was drinking far too much. Not wanting to get severe headaches I have now limited myself to 2 cans per day. If I space it out that is 4 small glasses with ice and that is plenty. I also realized how much water my body was lacking. This can be so very harmful. Organs will shut down if you don’t get enough water. Some of you might not know that, but here is your wake up call. Your body requires water to function properly and with the right amount of water, your digestive system will work more efficiently. Plus, by filling your stomach with water, you’ll eat less and feel full faster.

• Water helps flush your body of toxins and water weight. Yes, more water actually helps your body get rid of excess water.
• The daily minimum intake of water is 64 ounces (or almost 2 liters). If you’re like most people, your current intake of water is probably less than half of the recommended amount, so drink up!

2. Get off that couch and get active! That’s right, shake your groove thing girlie, even if it means dancing while running the vacuum. My kids used to laugh at me because I would turn on that song by the Village People…”YMCA” and dance around. Sure I looked like an idiot but who cares? I was burning calories! When you move your body you build muscle, which burns fat. There are so many activities that you can engage in that don’t cost money or require expensive gym equipment to help you get fit and lose weight. Here are some ideas:

• Walking around your neighborhood or in a local park
• Biking
• Hiking
• Swimming
• Throwing a ball with your kids or spouse
• Frisbee
• Volleyball
• Tennis
• Inline skating (with the proper safety equipment of course)

3. Start making healthier food choices! To effectively boost your calorie and fat burning processes, eat healthier foods like leafy green vegetables, fruits and lean meats.

• You’ll also want to limit your intake of red meat, high calorie and fat dressings, gravies and sauces and avoid sugary drinks, candy or other foods with lots of sugar.
• Sugar causes you to put on weight, so when you eliminate sugar, you help eliminate weight gain. Also, try to choose natural or organic foods in order to avoid consuming chemicals that may actually cause you to retain weight.

4. Use portion control to limit the amount of food you consume. Do you know what this means? Studies show that reducing the amount of food you eat actually produces the quickest weight loss. Obviously you want to do this in a healthy manner, not obsessively or out of control. So many people think they need to cut off their food supply to lose weight which is actually more harmful than good. It messes with your metabolism and can actually cause you to put all that weight right back on and then some….so eat! Here is my suggestion:

• Eating 6 small meals a day, as opposed to the three larger meals you’re probably accustomed to, has been shown to be healthier, help reduce fat stores and to increase metabolism.
• If you’re wondering what a healthy portion looks like, it’s all in the hands. In other words, a healthy portion or serving size is about the size of your fist, palm, or hand, depending on what food you’re eating.
• Close your fist. That’s a healthy portion size for a serving of rice, pasta or other side dish.
• Open your hand and look at the size of your palm. This is the perfect amount of chicken breast, pork or other types of meat. It should be about the size and thickness of a deck of cards.
• The size of your entire open hand is the perfect size for veggies.

5. Replace unhealthy snacks with nuts, raw veggies or fruit!

My grandmother used to always say, “An apple a day keeps the doctor away!” Here are a few examples to help you choose healthier snack options:

• When you’re craving chips or other salty, crunchy snacks, grab a handful of nuts instead. They are healthier for you and satisfy the craving for salt or crunchiness. Also, try to buy nuts with less salt. Natural or raw varieties will help to reduce your salt intake too.
• When you want something sweet, grab a piece of fruit like an apple, banana, orange, or melon. The natural sugar is way better for you than eating a bowl of ice cream or a handful (or two) of cookies.
• Have the munchies in general? Nibble on some raw carrots, celery or broccoli.

Losing 5 pounds can be fun and make you feel so much better about yourself. The best part is that it can be done quickly, in as little time as a week or two, depending on your specific circumstances.Whether it’s to kick-start your weight loss plan or to fit into that little black party dress, taking off 5 pounds is a step in the right direction to a healthier, more fit you. It begins now! So get off that couch and shake the pounds away! You’ll feel so good and your body will thank you, after all, as I say so many times….your body is your house, your protective barrier, take care of it, no one else will. It’s the only one you’ve got!

 

A friend of mine told me about a great book to pick up, it’s called “Eat This Not That!” I’ve listed it below for you to check out. recently it was also hot topic on the TODAY show! Sure you can still eat other foods, just learn what foods are better than others as far as calories, sodium and fat. You’ll be surprised what you learn from reading this book and you’ll begin making changes that will shed the pounds while still eating what you love!

http://www.simplydeliciouslingerie.com/

 

Ladies; How To Dress For Success

UNLIKE decades past, women working in corporate America do not wear string ties and buttoned-up collars. Nor do you see many in mid-calf skirts. Yet the concept of dressing for success is just as pertinent today as it was 10 to 20 years ago, perhaps even more so because the work world is more competitive. The new millennium-working woman must find a way to get ahead of her counterparts, male and female at other companies, but also within her own place of employment.

 Knowledge, skill and the ability to finesse corporate politics are instrumental, but one’s image and appearance also continue to be key factors in moving up in corporate America. If you want to achieve success, you must look successful. You must present an image of competence, self-confidence and professionalism. You must have the “look best” attitude.

 A secretary or administrative assistant is not held to the same standard as the vice president of human resources or the director of finance at a Fortune 500 company, and it should be noted that it is part of the business culture for employees even executives in advertising, media, entertainment and other creative fields to dress more casually than those in, say, banking and finance. When you must interact with the public, clients and business associates–in addition to your boss and other company executives then your appearance certainly should take on a more professional polish!

 Don’t cut corners on style and fashion when you have a job that enables you to shine. Don’t look frumpy especially if you work in fashion. Remember “The Devil Wears Prada?” This particular movie reminds me of the “Ugly Duckling” …..she begins a job that wasn’t something she had wanted, rather needed….and she doesn’t seem to care about because that wasn’t her dream job, let’s look at reality for a moment, do we ever really end up with our dream job? Some do, some don’t. So what did she do about it? Well, she realized after not too long that now she wanted the job and her desire peaked, she also wanted respect!…She brought in back up and made changes in her appearance, and in NO TIME FLAT won the respect of those who wouldn’t have given her a second glance prior to now.

 There is a moral to this story……Dress for the job you want, not for the job you have,…..and do accessorize ladies! Don’t over do it,…offices like simple yet stunning, not a lot of bling!  You want to stand out, but not too much, and you don’t want to just “blend in”…….so where is the happy medium, and the line drawn not to cross over? Good question, and with all jobs it is different. Depending on the type of position you have and what of business it is makes all the difference.

 In the business world today where it changes everyday….you want to follow the trend! If you want to be noticed, you’ll have to make some significant wardrobe changes. This is a win/win! You will turn more heads, and your opinions will matter! Show them that you are as business savvy as they are and take the reins! Soon, they’ll be seeking your opinions, and asking for your ideas! You won’t go unnoticed any longer. If you want to be taken serious, you must look serious, professional, and your etiquette must shine!

 Regardless of where you work, or what your profession is, go to work looking like a million bucks. You’ll turn heads, and before long you won’t be “that girl” ….Your peers who didn’t know you or recognize you before will now actually know you by name! Now ladies, let’s go…..Put your best foot forward!

 

 

Confidence and Positive Energy …Empower Yourself!

How confident do you feel about “you?” How strong is your energy flow? When you’re feeling unsure of yourself or your capabilities, your options in life can seem few and far between. Not only do you have trouble recognizing opportunities to improve your life, you also resist taking action and end up feeling stuck and defeated much of the time. Empowering yourself is a simple matter of switching your perspective and choosing to believe that you are not powerless or stuck. Here’s a good example,… you may currently have a perception that you’re not talented or  resourceful. Such a belief will keep you locked in a cycle of fear, futility and inactivity because you won’t see the point of trying to improve your life, or you’ll be too afraid to try. Is this sounding familiar at all? You need to focus your energies on you and being a better person because you are a better person, you just have to start believing in yourself. When someone tells you that you can’t…prove them wrong.

Regardless of the perceptions and beliefs that may be holding you back, there are specific things you can do to transform them and embrace more empowering beliefs. Below you’ll find three easy ways to help you switch your perspective from disempowerment to empowerment:

 

1. Challenge your limiting beliefs and fears.

Here are the cold hard facts. The most difficult thing about perceptions is that they appear to be undeniable truth in your own mind. For example, you may have held a belief for years that you’re not good at a particular task or activity, but when you begin to explore that “truth” later, you realize that you never gave it your full effort or didn’t allow time to fully master it. Once you do, you realize that you’re capable of much more than you ever suspected! Yes, you can do this!

In order to fully empower yourself, get into the habit of questioning and challenging any limiting beliefs, fears and doubts that come up about you or your capabilities. Are they really true? Why do you think so? Have you ever tried to prove them wrong? By asking questions like this and being willing to expand your perceptions, you quickly realize that you are the only one holding yourself back!

 

2. Affirm your strengths and capabilities frequently.

Along with disempowerment usually comes a belief that you’re weak and powerless, which is simply another perception! Begin changing this perception by affirming frequently that you are strong, powerful, talented and capable. Build up yourself up with encouraging words and thoughts and you’ll begin to believe in yourself more and more each day. Over time, this belief continues to grow and you’ll be able to do things you never would have believed you were capable of before.

3. Take action.

This is no time to get down on yourself…buck up and get a grip sister! Feeling disempowered usually causes you to hold back on taking action, either because you’re frightened, or because you believe it’s futile to try to change anything. Your first impulse might be to wait until you’re feeling stronger before you take action, but did you know that taking action can make you feel stronger? That’s right, taking action can empower you! You will feel soooo good about yourself! Be willing to take action in order to build up your confidence, even if you have to take very small steps. Come up with one small action you can take, push your fear aside and then go for it! Then keep that positive cycle going by taking small action steps and moving forward bit by bit, and eventually you’ll realize that you are anything but weak and powerless!

 

 

Is Mr. Right….Right Around the Corner?

 

Picture this…Every Saturday night, single women going on a ‘man hunt’ in search of  Mr. Right. What’s amazing is that many of them pass Mr. Right …1 every day in the office or while out walking the dog after work. We look high and low and some get lucky enough to find “him” and others walk a path in the ground with their dog that is bigger than a street on a road map. He’s as likely to be at your gym, shopping in your grocery store or standing in line at your favorite movie theatre as he is hanging around the singles mingle hour at some local bar. Honestly…he can be just about anywhere. Since it’s hard to find him, let’s look at the alternatives and search for the rules to make your job easier and your search more enjoyable:

 

Mr. Right Here

 

…is the guy who is handy. He works in your department or lives in your apartment complex. He might be the nice neighbor of your best friend. You’ve seen him so often that he blends into the scenery. He’s not pushy or forward and never comes at you with stupid pick up lines. He’s so nice that you immediately think there must be something wrong with him. But there’s not. He’s simply a nice guy, hard working and not trying too hard.

 

Mr. Right Now

 

…is the guy who’s asking you out for dates regularly. He wants to spend time with you, but you aren’t captivated by him. Finally, you look around and see all of your girlfriends with boyfriends, so you decide to hang onto him. After all, you don’t want to be the last girl left standing alone on the sidelines – and he’s happy just to be with you. You might actually like him if you weren’t using him for a prop to make you look popular while you scan the room for something better. Do people really do this, you bet they do.

 

Mr. Right for Them

 

…is the guy that everyone is certain is right for you and for soooooo many reasons.  He’s the son of your parents’ friends, your coworkers brother, cousin or boss and they’ve conspired several times so that you could meet him. He might be the college roommate of your best friend’s husband and they think he’s a wonderful guy that would be perfect just for you.

 

It’s possible that he’s a new member of the tennis club and your friends shuffle the foursome list so you can play doubles, hoping that the action extends beyond the court. Basically, you’re getting so much “help” from others that you aren’t sure if you really like him or if you’re trying to please other people who care about both of you.

 

Mr. Right… BUT

 

…is the guy that could be perfect, but there’s some impediment that you aren’t sure will work, you ponder the facts have uncertainties… Maybe he’s a divorced single father with custody of two small children. You aren’t even sure you want children and certainly not a ready-made family with instant motherhood. Or, he might have a job with extensive world travel or he’s in the military and could be stationed in hazardous locations for months at a time. this means no quality time together for long durations. So you ask..how can a relationship really grow?  He could be a great guy, but he just doesn’t fit your fairytale story – instead of the tall, handsome prince, he’s barely your height and prematurely balding…

 

So where is Mr. Right?

 

Before you answer, “I don’t know,” take a look around and I mean take  an honest look. Do you see Mr. Right Here, Mr. Right Now, Mr. Right for Them or Mr. Right But? You might take a second look. One of them could be your Mr. Right who is waiting for you to see him for what he really is.

 

What are the rules to follow?

 

When it comes to finding a Mr. Right, I have the most intricate and bewildering list of prerequisites …..the key? Put nature’s rules of romance into action!

 

Rule number one: first impressions are the key to success. As humans, we are often judgmental about the appearance of our admirers. A 5′ 11″ man with dark wavy hair wearing an Armani suit and an expensive Rolex is much more appealing than a man who’s 5′ 5″ with greasy unwashed hair and braces with a piece of broccoli stuck in them. Peacocks, too, make an important first impression for their potential mates. Male peacocks spread their tail feathers to impress the females, and the most beautiful peacock gets the girl!

 

Rule number two, a little bit of materialism does no harm. Admit it! You like it and you want to be around it more, so pay close attention to where he lives and his social patterns.

 

Rule number three, masculinity. I don’t know about you, but I prefer a strong, masculine man to a tender, feminine man. I want a man who dares to fight off other competitors. Kangaroos, too, box for love. The males punch each other in the face like professionals boxers, and once the loser is driven away the winner may pursue his love.

 

Rule number four, persistence….Wear it like a glove girls!  Sometimes we like to play hard-to-get. It’s our nature, we can’t help it! If bears can do it, so can you. A male bear follows his targeted female and tags along with her while she goes about her regular routines until she accepts him. Romantic tricks might also help. Humans like to engage in dancing, singing, and partying. Animals, too, have their mating calls and ritual dances.

 

Rule number five, a little FYI boys…we like gifts: jewelry, flowers, chocolates.  Regardless of when you find him just remember, love happens they say when you least expect it, so be prepared next time you run out in the rain to walk your dog, or drop a letter in the mail box for Mr Right to be right around the corner…it can happen to YOU!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Wonder of a Working Mom

All moms are working moms, and all moms face the challenge of prioritizing how they spend their time. Time management becomes absolutely critical, though, for mothers who must devote 40 to 50 precious hours a week to a job. For women in such situations, it’s crucial to streamline and simplify pretty much every imaginable area of life. We have sticky notes, and schedules, carpools, and PTA Meetings….sporting events- little league, soccer, volleyball games….when did it end?

 I’ll tell you when…..

 When they turn 16 and got a drivers license…that’s when! I handed them the keys and said GO! The day my son got his driver’s license he could have driven to China with his sister and I would have paid for the gas gladly! ……(jokingly that is just an expression my folks used to use…) truth at hand is, for the first time in years I was able to relax take a deep breath and get some chores and house work done….something I wasn’t used to getting done until after 9 pm at night. I didn’t become a single mom until the kids were 14 and 12 when I divorced…..that was difficult for me,…not sure why, they were pretty self-sufficient and they packed their own bags to go to Dads, or to go to school and grabbed their own lunch stuff. I have NO idea how women with small children do it. I applaud you, truly I do! I see women at the airport when I am on business trips with strollers packed full and holding kids under their arms while chasing the toddler and I think to myself…..”I have a hard enough time packing ‘me’ and getting here!” Women today are like Wonder Woman! We are built with super powers to do it all.

 These are just a few things that we Moms do……we knock them off the list one at a time;

• clean the house;
• do laundry;
• shop for groceries;
• take care of errands, which may include paying bills and handling financial matters;
• help kids with homework;
• be present at kids’ activities;
• spend time with partner;
• spend time with friends and family members;
• pursue personal interests of any kind;
• and “maybe — just maybe — sneak in an hour to go to the gym or to soak in a bubble bath.” (this was always an added bonus for me..) now I fall asleep in the tub with a glass of wine, soooo relaxed! Don’t think that there are not times where I missed the days tha tmy kids were young. I thought of it tonight as I sat with a friend outside of Dairy Queen watching all the soccer kids pile into and out of the mini vans and SUVs.

Hmmmm. No wonder so many women I know are so tired! When our heads hit the pillow we are out like a light!

 Get in a “Time Management” program at home: The following tips may not solve every time-management challenge that confronts you, but hopefully they’ll help you think about ways to simplify and save time as you manage your own unique schedule and circumstances.

1. Have places that things go and know where the keys are always! If you’re constantly tripping over shoes, losing library books or running late in the mornings because your kids can’t find their backpacks, homework or school books, something’s got to change. It may be time to institute a system for packing up backpacks with all necessary contents and leaving them by the door before bedtime — no exceptions. Baskets and low-cost storage bins also can help you organize the most troublesome items in your life.

 2. Smooth out the bumps in your mornings….no one wants to rush! Mornings are exceptionally rough for many working moms. It can be hard enough to get yourself ready, out the door and off to work on time, right? Well, that whole process becomes exponentially harder when you have to wake, feed, clothe, pack for and transport a small human being in addition to yourself. Do as much as you possibly can the night before.

 Wake up one full hour before your child does. This will allow you to drink coffee, get dressed, take care of your own pre-work tasks and get breakfast staged before the kids get moving. Plan to arrive everywhere 30 minutes early. (Note: You’ll probably never arrive anywhere 30 minutes early.) But this mindset of trying to arrive early will give you a much better shot at showing up where you’re supposed to be on time. Plan your meals a week in advance and grocery shop for all meals at that time. It saves time, energy, worry, and cash!!

Pack a bag with everything in it, and pack the car, snacks, bottled water, goodies. baby wipes, diapers, band-aids, toys, books, etc.

  Learn how to juggle kids “after school time” …..Ok, seriously, this can get tough….especially if one is at soccer practice and the other has piano lessons. I only had two kids and I had a difficult time…..what do people do with 3 or 4 or 5 or more? Keeping up with work at the office might get tricky but without the job, you wouldn’t have all of these added luxuries, nor would the kids.

Society today is so wrapped up in go go go and do do do, that we forget to slow down. Take time, enjoy your family because one day you’ll be sitting in an office at 10:00 o’clock at night in silence writing an article and realize how much you miss the good ole’ days!

 

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1 MoRe ShoPpiNg DaY,…No StrEsSiNg!

Holidays can be stressful, more so than normal shopping days, so remember, these sales people are just like you and I. They are people too and deserve respect. While many retailers will make an extra effort to ensure excellent customer service this holiday season, might I personally suggest that customers take these steps to help ensure a positive sales experience: Tis the season to be jolly, so please, don’t be a bitch. It’s the holidays for goodness sakes, so be nice. The only naughty we like to see at Simply Delicious Lingerie is when you buy our handcuffs and cute babydolls or erotic vinyl wear…thats naughty. That’s the only not acceptable! So if you can’t be nice…stay home and shop online. Don’t ruin the holiday spirit for others.

 Get to know the sales clerks at your favorite stores. This ensures that you will be in the loop regarding stores sales and events. A salesperson who knows you may also be more apt to help if a problem does arise.

My advice? Research store policies before you buy. Being aware of policies regarding cash refunds or sale merchandise returns can help you avoid problems later on. 

So what happens when you run into a problem?  Here are a few tips for successfully handling service complaints 

1. Take three deep breaths – when you are upset you may not think clearly and therefore often don’t present your case logically.

 2. Tell the company rep that you know that the problem is not their fault – this reduces their defensiveness.

 3. After outlining the facts, state exactly what you want the rep to do for you – if you don’t they might go off in the wrong direction in developing a response.

4. Don’t ask for cash compensation for your time – companies can almost never do that, but they can give you credit toward your bill.

 5. Never use profanity – most reps are authorized to hang up on you if you do – and it is not fair to the rep who did not cause the problem.

 6. If you have been a long-term customer, point that out but don’t exaggerate – employees can often access your actual purchase history, and as they say, the proof is in the pudding!

The simplest and most important thing you can do is to recognize good service when you receive it by remembering to say ‘thank you’ and even letting the sales person’s supervisor know. This can give them a boost for a possible increase in salary at the time of evaluations, and it may even give them the opportunity to grow with that particular company but getting a promotion.

Don’t over do it for shopping, and don’t exhaust yourself.  When we get tired we get moody…No one likes a man or woman with an attitude this time of year. Tomorrow is Christmas Eve and although there is only one shopping day left before Christmas Day, there are bargains and clearance sales to be found. Take a deep breath, look around you, smile, be thankful you are alive this year and celebrating such a season…and enjoy this holiday season. None of us know what tomorrow will bring, and you may not be here next Christmas, we don’t know what our future holds, so enjoy each and every day…our life is a gift, it is precious, so indulge in it and your loved ones!

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays,

From our Home to Yours at Simply Delicious Lingerie

Do you Know How to Turn Your Man On?

Get Naked Too

There’s a good chance that your guy has never feasted his eyes on your completely bare body for more than a few seconds. Maybe it’s because you undress quickly in a passion frenzy or your bodies are too close for him to really take you in. But letting him stare at you in the nude is a sure thing!

Break Out the Blindfold

Once you have him going crazy not knowing where your next lick, kiss, or stroke will land, treat your blindfolded boy to a slew of new sensations. Three to try: the feel of your hair, silk panties, or a string of pearls rubbed gently against his member.

Give Him a New Number

 No doubt, you’re intimately acquainted with 69. Now may we introduce you to 77? The number refers to the way you and your partner’s bodies look when they meld together in this side-entry position. The unique angling practically guides his missile to your G-spot! Don’t forget to slip into your sexy Simply Delicious Lingerie to entice him.

Turn Him into a Buffet

Incorporating food into your passion play is a classic carnal activity. Take a few of your favorite erotically appealing flavor combinations, like peanut butter and honey or whipped cream and chocolate sauce, and mix up yummy treats all over his body.

Talk Dirty to Him

Try this on for size….Start off with a purr or an mmmmoan, or simply breathe heavily in his ear, or on his shoulder. Then up the erotic ante by whispering, “So…what do you want to do with me now?”

 Make Him Long for Your Lips

A fabulous kiss is an intricate balancing act involving tongue technique, pressure control, and moistness monitoring. Invade his space with a tantalizing kiss on the neck, a slow lick of your lips and a gentle whisper in his ear.

Imply to Him That He’s a Stud…

How about sparking his ego by letting him know you want him real bad in a sexual way with a coy compliment. Letting him in on your longing for him jump-starts his own desire and will have him begging for you.

Make Him Hot, Then Cold…

 Cooling off your guy’s steamy body actually gets him hotter. If you didn’t think so, think again. You drive him crazy and you probably don;t even realize it. Make his satisfaction skyrocket by turning him on to simply deliciously unexpected strokes, pressure, and temperature changes. Try the classic ice-cube trick to make him shiver with excitement. Have him lie on his back, hold a cube in your hand, and slowly draw an icy line from his neck all the way down his body.

 

Seduce Him

Be direct by saying something like “I want to have sex with you.” The straightforward approach is not merely about saving time (although it does have a way of cutting to the chase), either way you are driving him up the wall. Honestly, it’s about giving yourself the opportunity to display extreme sexual confidence, yep, strut your stuff sister and  advertise yourself as a person who assumes that whatever she wants, she can have.

Toy with Him

Yes you heard me, with Simply Delicious Lingeries secret stash in our Adult Novelty section. Stock up on some sex toys. Rhinestone handcuffs can be exciting. And you can never go wrong with a vibrator. Nows your time to get risque’ – tis this holiday season where you determine if you are going to be “Naughty or Nice!”

 

Hosting a Holiday Party…

It’s that time of year again, and you want to get everyone together for festive fun! Hosting a party can bring about a great deal of stress. Sooooo many things to plan, so much to buy and so many people to invite. You may find this true for any kind of party, but it seems to be particularly true for a party thrown around the holidays. For some reason, the holidays are a time when parties aspire to be a little grander; they need to have tastier food, and more elegant alcohol! Lets face it, really,… when you plan a party you want YOUR party to be the one that guest remember for a long time and talk about often! You want your party to be the BEST!

While a holiday party is something you will likely want to throw well (hoping to impress your friends, your relatives, and your next door neighbor whose front lawn animatronics nativity scene makes your decorations look inferior), you will also want to save some room on your credit cards for all your holiday shopping. Throwing a great party doesn’t have to drain your bank account. There are ways to have a party that is both festive and frugal. Because alcohol is generally one of the priciest party expenses, buying wisely is the first step in throwing a party that will leave both your social circle and your children still talking to you.

Have a Variety
Some people are under the impression that hosting a party involves purchasing the most expensive wine they can find, wine that would impress even the most seasoned connoisseur. However, when it comes down to it, the price of wine is not nearly as important as the variety.

Holiday parties typically consist of a large spread of food. From the pâté to the cheese balls, the months of November and December are like a giant buffet. Because of this, it’s important to cover your bases and purchase wine that is adaptable, wine that all types of food consider easy to get along with. The simplest way to do this is to cover all your bases by purchasing both red wine and white wine.

 For red wine, Merlots, Shiraz, and Cabernets are all good choices, with white wine’s best bet being Chardonnay, though a nice Alsatian Riesling is also a great choice. I personally prefer a Rriesling. While there are certain vintages that are expensive, it’s relatively easy to find bottles that aren’t extremely high-priced. With some searching, or asking the clerk at the local liquor store for help, you can buy red and white wines that won’t take away your ability to go holiday shopping, leaving you, ultimately, to holiday shoplift instead.

When choosing a wine to serve at a party, White Zinfandel seems to be an extremely popular choice. This is simply because people drink it up. A chilled beverage, White Zinfandel is light, sweet, and low in alcohol content, which makes it a popular choice for folks who are driving. One of the least inexpensive, with many bottles costing around five dollars, White Zinfandel is a preferred choice of many party hosts everywhere, why I have no idea? Honestly, it’s not at all my first choice, but when hosting a party you must put your needs aside and buy what your guests will want to drink.  I call this a ‘safe zone’ in wines. It’s the ‘you can’t go wrong’ wine.

Take People Up on Their Offers
What are you serving? Who decides what the menu will be? Are you expected to do it all by yourself? Generally it is etiquette for those attending a party to offer to bring something – a casserole, a plate of cookies, a spinach dip. While you may have trouble accepting this gesture, thinking that you should be the one to generate all the party goods, keep in mind that many people who offer to bring something typically really want to, so say YES!

People enjoy showing their gratitude. When they are able to contribute to a party, they feel as if they are given the opportunity to do just that. If a person asks you if they can bring anything, and you are stressing over the drink selection, simply request that they bring a bottle of wine. This not only assures that they will bring something they enjoy, but it also allows you to subtly shrug your shoulders and point your finger in their direction if others do not like it. That, after all, is what friends are for.

Holiday parties can be hard to plan, but with the above tips you should at least have the wine list taken care of, leaving you free to worry about food and décor instead. Holidays are already stressful, so lighten up and enjoy your coworkers, family or friends this time of year! Worried about the decorations? Many of us have kids that want to assist us in decorating, and generally my kids used to love helping out…but we don’t want our children to feel bad about not being able to attend this ‘adult party’ so get them involved so that they feel they really took part in this fun event. My advice…let them make cool decorations. All kids love to make and cut out snowflakes, let them create a winter wonderland for you! They’ll love it and it will give your place a fun holiday appeal!